sex toys for women = insecurity for men

This one is for the men and I got a feeling you aren’t going to like it very much…but hear me out and listen,  holy shit just listen and you’ll thank me later.

Judging by the emails I’ve gotten apparently some/ a lot of you men out there don’t approve of your women having sex toys. I didn’t know this so I started asking around, the answers I’ve gotten well….. Yeah I don’t get it.

So there are really two issues here, number one women getting themselves off with toys when he’s not around and number two including the toys in love-making.

I think they are really one and the same problem….insecurity and intimidation and both are unwarranted.

Some of the “complaints” from the men have been getting……

  1. A toy bigger than my penis will satisfy her and the result will be her wanting a bigger cock.

So the issue here is size, my answer will probably be disagreed with but you’re here reading my blog for a reason so…. 🙂


That’s right, even for you ladies that say bigger is better, you’re wrong too.

Oh but I feel fuller…..he reaches places nobody ever has……he stretches me and OMG it feels so good.

How about this? There are two ways for a woman to orgasm, one through clitoral stimulation and the other through G-spot…..oh yea? What about women that can come with nipple stimulation huh? What about women that can come during anal or just by squeezing their muscles when aroused? Huh? Huh, huh Mr sexpert? I can see it now, this will be my longest blog post ever with questions like that 🙂  ok…short answer, nerves….nerves running from the nipple to the clit……..vibrations, during anal vibrations run through the walls and stimulate the G-spot and the clit….yes the answer should be more detailed but just trust me and let’s get back on track.

Back to size, the G-spot is located on the upper wall of the vagina about 2”-3” in towards the stomach…it’s an area not a spot or button.

So…..are you three inches in length? If you so you can reach it, you can work it, stimulate it and make her come so hard she calls you Big Daddy….. So why are you intimidated by size again? It’s not how deep you fish; it’s how you wiggle the worm that produces results.

G-spot up top so cock angled up right? Riiiight!!

As far as you ladies that say bigger is better….have you ever had a man who knew what he was doing? No…I mean really knew, knew how your body would respond better than you do, knew how to play you like a fine tuned instrument? If you haven’t then you’re going to assume that bigger is better and being “full” is where it’s at….coming so hard you can’t walk or talk is where it’s at ladies.

Men…learn how to do this! Become a Master in the bedroom!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve personally been asked “how big are you?” really? Would you be offended (ladies) if a guy asked how tight you were?

Ut oh!! I just stepped in it didn’t I? Well since I’m here let’s kick it around a little shall we?

Society has decided that if you aren’t hung like a horse and as thick as a tree trunk then us men are inadequate, Men are so focused on the size of their dick (women are too) that the art of making love isn’t important anymore.  What you should be asking is do you know how to please me? Can you find my G-spot? Do you know what to do with it once you do find it? What about my clit? Do you know what to do with it? Hard or soft, fast or slow?

Ladies you know I love ya, most of my blog posts are focused on making it better for you but you’re asking the wrong questions and causing the men to focus on the wrong answers. Penis enlargement pill sales are at an all time high and they don’t even work and I bet if I wrote a book on how to really please a woman I couldn’t give it away.

Continue to ask the wrong questions and focus on the wrong things and the results will always be mediocre, some of you don’t even know what you’re missing out on.

Complaint number two

  1. If I use toys during love-making and she really likes it she won’t “just” want me anymore.

Well. That may be true but….that comes back to you knowing how to really please her. If you don’t, then learn, if you do, then you already know its bull shit, let me explain.

The toys can be a great way to give you (the man) a break, let’s face it, it can be hard work pleasing a woman, no I’m not saying women are hard to please but there are several things we the men have to be keen to.

We have to watch, listen and feel…and interpret correctly what we see, hear and feel.

We have to make sure she’s ready, has she come yet? (always make her come before intercourse) have we switched back and forth between clit and G-spot enough to have them both swollen, full of blood and ready for stimulation.

Is the angle right? She’s moving, bucking her hips or even barely raising them and when she does the angle changes so we have to change with her, every stroke must go upwards to keep the pressure on the G-spot.

Is the speed right? Is she close? Do we speed up? Slow down? Where is she? Are her nipples hard? (Different blog post) is her body tense, how hard is she breathing.

Yes ladies bet you didn’t know us men have a mental checklist we have to go down in order to make the pearly gates open and the angels start singing.

So toys…. Yes toys can give you the night off and still let you be the man, get it wet, slip it in, grab a vibrator and make her come.

Most importantly and the main reason us men shouldn’t be concerned with the toys….toys cant mow the yard lol, just kidding. That vibrator can’t look her in the eyes and make her know that it feels what she feels, it can’t hold her, it can’t talk to her and tell her how good she feels or how tight she is or how freak’n much it loves making love to her, how happy it is or how bad it’s been wanting her all day. there’s no emotional connection with the vibrator.

Women need that just as bad as we need to be wanted, just as bad as we need to feel like nobody can please her like we can, she needs that too and the biggest 132 speed vibrating 360 degree rotating head with afterburners and heat sensors can’t give that to her, it can’t cuddle afterwards, it can’t lay down beside her out of breath and her know that as good as it was for her she just rocked your world too.

Stop being intimidated, stop being insecure and go get some toys, surprise her with them, hide them under the bed, tie her up and break those bad boys out and make the bed tremble with excitement, make the walls need a cigarette after you’re done and guess what she’ll tell her friends? My man knows how to take care of me girl! Not about how good that vibrator is, not how big it is, not how much she loves it….but how much she loves you for caring enough about how she feels to not only learn how to please her without the toys but for buying the toys and using them to please her too.

I’ll wrap it up with this comparison.

Do You like to jack off? Does it feel good laying there with your eyes closed, Johnson and Johnson spread evenly over your cock, your hand gripping it and Pamela Anderson is on her knees in front of you? It does doesn’t it?

Would you rather have that? or a warm hot body telling you how much she loves you? How bad she’s wanted you all day? How wet she is and how bad she’s aching for your hard cock to be inside her?

It’s the same for her if you know what you’re doing; sex is as much about emotional connection as it is physical contact…toys can’t give that bro….only you can!

Here is a good place to start if you want more information and tips that will help you become a master in the bedroom

As always your comments are welcomed as well as suggestions for blog post, please email suggestions to

Dont forget to follow by email for updates and new post

This entry was posted in For the ladies, For the men. Bookmark the permalink.

14 Responses to sex toys for women = insecurity for men

  1. Lois says:

    Will you marry me? Just kidding 🙂 I love your blog! You are point on in all the advice you give. I get excited every time I see Sexpert Advice in my email…Keep it coming 😉

  2. gloria says:

    Good advice! I agree with all you say! Keep them coming!

  3. ladyinhiding says:

    I have to agree with you completely I do not think size matters and I am a huge fan of toys!!! If she is willing to sleep with you -men-she wants u not just a toy-she wants u for u women have a more of a emotional connection during sex/love making we don’t get that connection that a man can give when we use toys….

  4. Carmen says:

    Love the blog!! You are spot on, though in my experience I lean toward bigger, & used toys if the other was up for it. It’s all about knowing what u like, ur confidence, & ur partner.

    Keep up the great work! 😉

  5. Your posts should be required reading for every man getting ready to be sexually active, and as a refresher for those who already are!

    I’m lucky – hubby isn’t hung like a horse, but he knows how to use it all, and he brings the toys in. The biggest turn-on in the world is knowing he cares enough to be certain I’m enjoying to the max.

    I’d love to see some posts about men’s sexual responses and how their woman can send them into orbit. So many women assume that simple penile stimulation will do it, but I think a man’s body and responses are as complex as a woman’s.


  6. The best one yet…Spot on 🙂

  7. Pammie says:

    HOT DAMN THIS MAN GETS IT!! I agree with you 200%….size does not matter…it is what you do with what you have that matters…your breath, your voice, your eyes, your lips, your tongue, your fingers, and your cock. I have been married for 37 years and my man knows what he is doing and LOVES to bring my toys into the play. Do I prefer my toys more than him…NEVER….I want his cock inside me whether I’ve had my orgasm first or not. I want that contact and closeness. He listens and watches me and KNOWS my body and my soul. YOU ARE CORRECT IN EVERYTHING YOU SAID…keep it up….. hehehe….<3

  8. buffykennedy says:

    So I’m new here, and this is the first post I read…holy crap! You have a new fan for life, just so you know. I need to send my husband to this post o.o

  9. live cams says:

    You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation
    but I find this matter to be actually something which I think I would never understand.
    It seems too complicated and very broad for me.
    I am looking forward for your next post, I will
    try to get the hang of it!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s